My book, THE 30-DAY HEARTBREAK CURE is not just for those who have gone through a break-up. It's also a gentle and loving guide for helping people come to the conclusion on whether or not relationship is (or will be) good for them.
Often we focus so long and hard on whether or not someone wants us, we've forgotten to really ask ourselves whether or not we want them. It's about taking our ego out of it. It's about getting out of someone else's head and back into our own. It's about rediscovering your self and loving who that is! It's about laughing and having many A-HA! moments.
The book is also excellent for people who are dating. With the exponentially growing members of internet-dating and social network sites, it's more important than ever to get your head and heart in a smart place. There is a beautiful balance between being soft and being tough, and neither is a bad thing.
There's a quite a lot of useful information about how to "read" people in a healthy, constructive way, how to listen and watch for the clues when someone's words don't match their behavior. Why we choose to bypass critical information early in relationships when we should be wide-awake. In the book, I refer to that as being distracted by the "bright shiny objects." There are a lot of laughs, and probably a lot of tears, and they are all necessary for the intent of inside-out healing.
In my book, we can learn the benefit of self-responsibility, and how we can stop harming ourselves with patterns and belief structures that don't serve us anymore, this is extremely important. Learning how to draw boundaries is more important then ever. Understanding how and why we got where we are is huge. I can't tell you the number of people I meet while doing this work, who say they keep having the same relationship over and over again, and only the face changes. It's very common. We have almost all done it, and we can all stop doing it at any time we choose. The beauty of life is that what we have learned, we can unlearn and re-learn. Every day is a new beginning.
As far as I know, there are no classes in high school that includes LIFE 101 in the curriculum. It is rare to be taught about creating, loving smart, or loving self, unless we have an extraordinary teacher who takes it upon themselves to bring it into the classroom. I love visiting high schools and colleges and giving talks there, we have a ton of fun and everyone walks away changed. Including me. Sometimes, I bring my hypnosis into the mix because it really speaks to younger people about the power of their minds and using their powers for good.
When it comes to matters of the heart, we are often told a lot of information, without really telling us how to change the most important part of this two-person thing called a relationship. The secret is in the way we think.
It's up to us to take care of ourselves and have a powerful and correct mind-set to choose our relationships with as much care as possible. All relationships. When you take the time to really know your own mind and how it works, there is not nearly as much to be afraid of. You learn to trust your God-given instincts, and, more important, you learn to listen to them.
Women beat themselves up when a relationship ends. It's even worse if they are currently in, or have ever been in, a verbal or emotionally abusive relationship. Many are, and don't even know it. There are a few chapters that touch on this in a very gentle and caring manner. I want my readers to understand that they can be gentle with themselves, while at the same time, understand what's happening. How they might have arrived to that place, and how to avoid it in the future.
I cover a lot in this program, and it's interesting how each reader takes something different away from it. We learn that we are really not all that different from each other. It doesn't matter whether you're rich, poor, shy, gregarious, educated, or not. The heart is a separate issue that levels us all. It's not our fault that we make mistakes. We're not "stupid," we simply didn't know what we didn't know. I have learned from the setbacks, and I use what I've learned in moving forward. If you do the work, it works. And it's easy and joyful work. I like to say, "this book will take you from a meow to a roar."
My dream is to bring all hearts together and have us share our stories. We all have stories, but we must be careful not to become our stories. "Every setback is a set-up for a come-back" the saying goes, and it's true. That's what this program helps to achieve. I want women to get excited about their lives! I am so looking forward to this book tour, I will give a talk, sign books, and love up on people, which is my absolute favorite thing in the world to do! We will have a lot of laughs. Laughter heals. Whether you are a fan from ONE LIFE TO LIVE, or want to know more about my book, come on out to meet me!Catherine Hickland has played Lindsay Rappaport on ABC's "One Life to Live" for the past nine years. She is also a certified hypnotist. For more information about THE 30 DAY HEART BREAK CURE (2009; $19.95; Simon Spotlight Entertainment), tour scheduling and Catherine, visit: www.catherinehickland.com.